Nakita Chyalia (Tshiab Liag) Vang

I call this: notesfromnakita because I found healing in jotting positive notes and truthful feelings to myself when my 6 year relationship ended. I wanted to share notes with others in hopes of helping them find healing too.

But the truth of this blog is, I’m writing for a little girl out there somewhere; a little girl like the 17 year-old me. That 6 year relationship, was the first relationship of my life: a taboo relationship (same last name). In the Hmong culture, that is possibly the worst crime you could commit. I spent hours and days searching the internet for any sign of light: blogs, YouTube videos, articles, anything. To help me feel less alone, to reassure me that my life was worth it, that I am enough, and I am acceptable.

But I only found hate forums and bullying.

I guess sometimes when no one else understands, it is proof that you are traveling the path un-walked.

I may no longer be in that relationship (for reasons unrelated to my last name), but it didn’t happen in vain. So this is me, owning up to my narrative, and taking responsibility to be the person I once needed.

Everything happens for a reason.