Feeling Lost: Unlearn What You Know to Grow

I believe our twenties, is the time when we come to realize each day that everything we thought we knew about life, is no longer true, and that in order to become, sometimes we need to unbecome.

In order to learn and grow, we have to unlearn everything we once knew.

In all ordinary aspects of our lives, as well as the extraordinary.


Like a painter who no longer has hands, but paints with their feet.
Like a violinist who no longer has arms, plays with their shoulders.
Like an injured athlete, who learns a new passion.
Like a Soul Surfer, Bethany Hamilton, a free-spirited surfer, who loses her arm to a shark attack, and wins her greatest success–becoming a champion.

These are unique cases, but this is a common occurrence in our daily lives.

A common occurrence of having to choose to succumb to your circumstances, or to find the will within you, to unlearn everything you once knew, accept the narratives you are given in this lifetime, to become your highest potential.


Common occurrences a part of our life like:
The heartbreak that teaches us what we really need and deserve.
The friendships that teach us to be more selective.
The things that have hurt us or stopped us from pursuing our passion and dreams.


Right now in my life, I am unlearning so many things.

I am unlearning love to mean holding onto the ones you love, and learning that the best love is loving them freely.

I am unlearning that there is only one cookie cutter standard of what a good friend is, and learning that my door is happily open for those who want to stay.

I am unlearning that my partner should be one who loves all my greatest qualities, but more so, embraces, teaches, and understands all my flaws.

I am unlearning that I have to become one and only one thing in life, and rather life can be me, simply me, just doing all the things that make me feel most alive.

I am unlearning my habits of avoiding my fear of dancing, and learning that life is too short to be controlled by my own imagination.

I am unlearning that I need to become the dancer I once was, and that I can let go of everything I once knew about dance, and become the best dancer I can be right now, even if that means starting from ground zero.

I am learning so much in my life right now, my 24 years up until now, has come full circle. I have learned what I needed, let go of what doesn’t apply anymore, and taken on new perspectives for the current new phase of my journey.


Because life is like that, it is ever changing and you are allowed to change.

So maybe, you don’t know what you want anymore. And maybe you don’t know where you’re going anymore.

And that’s totally okay.

Because maybe you are just unlearning, just unbecoming. So you can become; the greater version of you. The You, you are meant to be.

Because if you don’t unlearn, how will you have the capacity to learn all the new and better things?

You are not lost, you are just finding your way. And you are right where you are meant to be.



Photo by Kunj Parekh on Unsplash

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